I understand that no other person can resolve my internal conflict; that is ones own responsibility. However I am tired and cannot see that what I have done or attempting to do is effecting change. It seems that at a very basic or fundamental level I am deeply flawed and disfunctional. How can something broken fix something broken.
A colleague said a particular word the other day and that triggered something for me that I have now fought for days to control. That is not sustainable.
I can’t see how I can bring the right pieces together for this person to work. When does one make an objective assessment on whether this is workable or not. I am a pathetic useless being.
More than anything I want to be able to live and accept love and be ok, and more than anything I want to kill and die.
If I Talk 